Online Dating Fraud

Originally written by Chris Nickson, updated by the editorial team on 1st April 2026

The Internet has taken romance global. That increases the possibilities for finding your soul mate, but it also makes love into a greater minefield. Not only are there the usual pitfalls of relationships, but you also have to deal with online dating fraud. No one can help with love, but some care can eliminate the other problems

The Types of Dating Fraud

You meet someone online, either in a chat room or through a dating site. You become close. They claim to be from Britain or America, working in Nigeria or elsewhere in Africa. They're paid in money orders, which they ask you to cash. You agree, deposit them in your bank and send the cash. A few weeks later you learn the money orders are forgeries, and you're responsible for the total. Meanwhile your lover has vanished.
Through a dating site you meet someone, possibly from Eastern Europe or Asia. After a while they want to visit you, but need money to get a visa. You send it, then more for other requests. Emergencies might mysteriously arise, necessitating even more money. You prospective lover eventually disappears, leaving you not only broken-hearted but poorer.

There are several variations on these themes, but generally they all involve people far away and requests for money, or to cash money orders. However, there are also the scams of the dating agencies themselves.

Less scrupulous sites will put up fake profiles. Contact them and you will receive e-mails, but the relationship won't go anywhere. They exist simply to make the site look bigger. Just before your subscription expires you might well receive a mail from someone supposedly interested in you. However, it's merely a ploy to make you renew. There have even been reports of employees taking subscribers out as a ploy to make them renew.

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How To Fight Dating Fraud

When you meet someone online it's easy to get carried away. These simple rules might stop a lot of hurt.

Don't believe everything you're told. There are many genuine people looking for romance, but also plenty eager to take advantage. It's best to be sceptical, hopefully, you'll be pleasantly surprised later.
Ask for not just one photograph, but several. It's easy to obtain a fake picture, but several are much harder. If they don't have a picture, be extremely wary. Likewise if he or she looks like a model. In real life most people simply don't look that good.
Take things slowly, whatever your heart tells you. Look for inconsistencies in what they write. Don't be afraid to quiz them.
Try to talk to them on Instant Messenger, preferably voice chat or via webcam. Sadly, men sometimes masquerade as women. Talking to them and seeing them will assure you.
Ask for an address (not a P.O. box) and phone number. Call them. If they never answer and there's no voicemail, be extremely suspicious.
Under no circumstances agree to any financial services or send money.

Finding a reputable dating site might seem easy. After all, there are plenty out there. But a number are scams. These are the best ways to find a good one:

If they put up several "barriers" for clients, i.e. you have to write an essay about yourself and submit several photographs. This indicates they're taking the time to be sure the people online are real.
Begin with a short-term subscription, making sure you know how to cancel it. If you receive a flurry of interest just before it expires, don't believe it's all genuine.

Your situation may be slightly different. ask a question below ↓ and our editorial team will reply with our advice.

What To Do If You've Been Scammed

If you've sent money to an individual abroad, the chances of recovering it are small. However, you can contact Citizens Advice at www.citizensadvice.org.uk or on 03444 111 444 for advice and to report the matter. Also tell the dating or chat room site where you met the person.

If you believe a dating site is acting illegally, don't renew your subscription. Instead, contact the Competition and Markets Authority, supplying all the documentation that you have.

The Next Step

Now that you have read through the advice above, you might want to put it into practice. Our Scam Detector lets you got a text, call, email or offer that feels off? Paste it in below and we will tell you how scammy it looks, the warning signs to spot, and exactly what to do next. Try it now →

7 questions

Ask Safe from Scams a Question

datingsitesuccess 01/05/2014 at 11:19 am

I stumbled across a dating site which was new at the time (2 years ago) called giggadate. It's said it was set up solely to clean up the "fake" dating site industry. I've followed it on and off now to see if it got big and although it has upgraded lots of times it hasn't caught on. I think the fact that every member has to verify their profile to prove they are real is what puts people off. If only a few people are willing to prove their authenticity then i think it speaks volumes about the way dating sites work! Also im astounded about how many websites i join and get messages from other members even when i have hardly filled out my profile and have no pictures uploaded. Who would message a half filled out basic profile with no images? what a surprise to find that the message cant be read without upgrading! lol its all a big scam. Giggadate is the least scammy site i have found.

veryconned 24/03/2014 at 4:03 pm

I used some very well know 'real' dating sites before and met people, and had relationships. So I tried a new site that was pay per message, called nostringsnow, which seemed great at first, regular replies and and conversations, but anytime you asked for an email or to swap details they would reply that they wanted to carry on through the site as they felt safer that way, or that they had just topped up to talk to you. In the end without realising you spend hundreds on messaging women, who actually never want to meet, and probably work in a cubical replying to lonley people trying to find people to beome friends with. The site, must be a scam, as worringly all 17 women I contacted got in touch were all attracted to me (I am no looker by any shakes) and then wanted to chat, but despite how detailed a message you send them you only ever get a few lines back and then have to send another, as they all ask to get to know you better, even after many messages they wont contact unless its on the site. I would say definately avoid, and has anyone else been bitten by this fairly new sit, or is it just I was very unlucky?

unhappy dad 12/02/2013 at 10:15 pm

My Son Met A Girl On A Dating Site , He Chatted On The Phone alot , It Turns out that he was on a premium line . He Now Has a Bill of three grand. , Orange still want the three grand he owes . he is at uni and he is not working . .

grumps 26/07/2012 at 10:38 pm

The date agency uk does exactly that. One address was given as 500 yards from me I asked if they lived there and the address changed to another tiny village address.

tigerlily 09/07/2012 at 7:43 am

I've tried Dating Sites and they are completely fake.
They shouldn't be allowed to operate, Never been asked for money on them, they would be told where to go. And some of the blokes on there are well ugly and i think they fell out of the ugly tree on the way down. Most of them as well are married or just perverts, getting a kick out of being on these sites. And you can look on other sites and the men are the same.
When you try and contact a person for help with your account, you never can actually to speak to anyone as most are in America.
I would never ever use one again, they charge you a huge amount of money to use these sites. All i can say that they are DANGEROUS and should be Banned.

wondering 07/07/2012 at 12:58 pm

Suzki113 yes i would like to know more what happen , i feel like these dating sites ..there dont put up photos ..u have no idea who it is ...i have had some really rough experiences ...just wondering ???

fed up with social s 20/04/2012 at 7:56 pm

I've used dating sites for over 11 yrs and was beginning to think that I was paranoid but other people are reporting the same problems. The sites are full of false profiles. Sometimes I report 20 or more per night but I'm realising that it's the actual dating site people doing it. You see laots of similar profiles. To attract women they state the man is a widower, one child, degree level or higher educated. Hints at wealth / good job etc. Something needs to be done about these sites . It's highly organised.I'm sure our pics and info are used to bulk out sister sights in other countries as we're often asked for more pics. Or could it be a way of collecting info for I.D. fraud?

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